You're not making whiskey better, you're making honey worse.

Tonight's review is of Evan Williams Honey Reserve.

I think I like bourbons so much because in order for it to be considered a bourbon it can't have any added flavoring or color. Only water can be added to it and only to dilute the proof. That means bourbon never has an artificial flavor or weird aftertastes. That also means that this is a whiskey and not a bourbon.

So I have seen this in the store for a few months but I was afraid to try it after the Dewars Honey flavored disappointment. But I liked the Evan Williams Bourbon alright so hopefully this will be better. It claims to be all taste with no sting. We'll see about that <$10 whiskey!

Cost: Again, 9.99 from Food Max

Alcohol Content: 35%

Method: Neat

Color: Light yellow.

Nose: Well, it doesn't smell like honey. I'm not quite sure what it smells like. Maybe apples? It smells like cold fruit I guess.

At this point I want to say that I am afraid. I asked Aaron to smell it and tell me what he thought it smelled like. He said it smelled like perfume and rubbing alcohol. Then he tasted it and said "No, bad. They're bad people for making this. Is this that same bad honey one from before? I regret asking what this was. It's the worst thing I've tasted in a month!".

Shit.

Taste: Oh god. You can almost feel thick honey on your tongue. This is like cheep orange flavored honey sticks that you get at a tea shop. This was a bad decision. You can't even taste the whiskey underneath the bad honey flavor.

Finish: It's like I drank a glass of sugar water at maximum saturation. I imagine it's a hummingbird's daydream.

Maybe it's better with cola? Like a whiskey cola? Let's try it out!

It's like extra sweet coke. If you add enough to it you can't taste it. Like homeopathic honey. So it's not really good for that.

How about as a whiskey sour? I made one without adding simple syrup or sugar since it's sweet enough.

No. Don't do this. This was a bad idea.

In short skip this junk. Whiskey makers need to leave the bees alone. What did they ever do to you that you need to defame them like this? Just make whiskey taste like whiskey. If you need to make your whiskey taste like a McDonald's breakfast item then you just don't like whiskey...

And that's okay!

But stop this madness.

10/100

Review of George Dickel Tennessee Sour Mash Whisky No 8

Tonight's review is of George Dickel Tennessee Sour Mash No8. It was the only version of this brand my grocer had for sale. I wonder if the No8 is just a gimmick or if they had to go through 7 versions of crap before they got to this. 

Method: Neat 

Alcohol Content: 40%

Cost: 20ish. Can't remember. 

Color: Like gold and rust mixed together. 

Nose: Mellow. It doesn't really smell like much of anything except slightly like sugar. 

Taste: Again mellow, light burn but hardly anything for a whisky. Maybe a very light apple. 

Finish: Burn is more on the lips than the tongue. Mellow finish. 

Notes: So this is okay. If  you wanted someone to get a taste for a basic whisky this is it. It doesn't have a strong flavor of anything at all and is pretty good. But there is a lot better stuff out there for if you're wanting to drink it neat. I mean, don't get me wrong...this is fine neat. But my preference would be for something with a little stronger flavor notes on the taste and finish. But this would be perfect for cooking or cocktails. 

Try it if you get a chance. But don't drive cross country for it. 

Anyways. Today is Aaron's birthday so wish him well! 

Wild Turkey 101

Tonight's review is of Wild Turkey 101 which I picked up because it was comparable in price to the Evan's from the same store and I wanted to see the differences.

Cost: 19.98 at FoodMax (take it to the max)

Method: Neat
Color: tan-orange. Like 90's sunglasses. 
Alcohol Content: 
Nose: fruity, candy apple, hints of vanilla
Taste: lemon, sugar, burning on the swallow.
Finish: 

Notes: This is pretty harsh for a bourbon. It'is sweet in your mouth. And so long as you keep it in your mouth it doesn't hurt. But the minute you swallow it your throat feels like the golden brick road to Chernobyl. It doesn't taste bad. None of it tastes bad. It's just for the first five seconds I was afraid I was going to die. 

For the second five seconds I was afraid I *wouldn't*.

Previous to tonight I had only had it in a whiskey sour. It was great in a whiskey sour. I would not drink this straight. 

Straight score: 70/100. Not undrinkable but be prepared. 

WHISKEY SOUR RECIPE. 
1 TBS sugar
2 TBS lemon juice
2 OZ bourbon
ice

Add sugar and lemon to shaker. Shake until emulsified. Add bourbon and shake vigorously. Pour over ice.

Evan Williams Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey

Tonight's review is of Evan Williams Bourbon. I like bourbon. It's an inexpensive unpeated alternative to scotch and sweeter than whiskey. I'm trying to convince my husband to take a trip to Kentucky in a few years to do the bourbon trail. The only problem is Kentucky is, you know, Kentucky. I know nothing about Kentucky except some old dude made some chicken, they have bourbon, I believe they watch horses run in a big circle, and I assume it's hot and humid. Only some of those things sound fun.

Anyways onto the review.

Cost: $9.99 from Food Max (so you know it's high quality)

Alcohol Content: 43%.

Method: Neat

Color: Deep reddish brown. Like a wet bark chip.

Nose: Brown sugar, vanilla bean, light hints of wood, for sure alcohol scent but not unpleasant.
Taste: Oh man this is weird. It tastes nothing like it smells. Normally that means it smelled horrible and tastes great or smells great and tastes horrible. But this is different. It's not bad at all but unexpected. Like, you know when you are eating dinner at a restaurant and you have a glass of water and a glass of soda  and you go to take a drink of your water but you get soda instead and the soda doesn't taste bad but it's unexpected so you kind of freak out a little bit? It's like that.

This tastes like oak and sugar and a little like pear. I'm not getting any vanilla. It's like if you had a creamy sugary pear popsicle and had gotten down to the wood part that's what this tastes like.

Finish:  Oak, slight alcohol, brown sugar, almost a caramel flavor but not quite.

Over all this was pretty good. Much better than what I was expecting for 10 bucks. Its a little harsh on the finish and might go better in a cocktail if someone wasn't used to bourbon or whiskey. But it's for sure drinkable on its own.

Not a scotch - Don Chelada Michelada Beer Booster and Hangover Helper

Today's review is of Don Chelada Michelada in Original Flavor because they were in a bargain bin at the grocery store. I'll be upfront and say that I have no idea what any of those words mean except Original and Flavor. But I can only assume it's Spanish for "wat?"

It's basically a styrofoam cup with some unnamed spices glued? to the rim. The cup says it has a mega moist rim and the cup does not lie. I have no idea how it's retained moisture but I can only assume it's bad that it has. It comes with a hefty packet of more of the rim seasoning inside.

The cup also says that it's a hangover booster. It doesn't say how but who am I to disagree?

The instructions are easy enough. Take off the plastic cover. Dump out the packet into the cup. Pour in 24oz of your favorite beer (or one you don't mind wasting) and consume.

It forms like mad. And the whole beer turns dark orangey brown. We used Guinness American Lager.

In short it tastes like poop.

It's not spicy but it burns the lips. I can't imagine what the spicy flavor does to your insides. I can't place the flavor but it's familiar. I would not buy this again and I probably won't even finish the drink. Aaron and I were going to split it but he took a sip and just said "no".

All in all this is something you should pair with natty ice or mickey's wide mouth, nothing of value. I feel like I wasted a good beer.

50/100. Take a pass on this.